> > > You haven't shown up at DBA every week as required by the 
> > > Church of Beer.
> > 
> > I've tried to worship.  The pagans prevent me.
> > 
> > I haven't seen you there recently, either, Mr. Metzger...
> 
> I am apostate rather than an apostle.

  APOSTATE, n.  A leech who, having penetrated the shell of a turtle
  only to find that the creature has long been dead, deems it expedient
  to form a new attachment to a fresh turtle.

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